oh brother.

today, i miss Geoff.

i would like nothing better than to be in the passenger seat of that little white eclipse, music pulsating through the seats and the purr of the manual transmission vibrating the doors; my feet on the dash and the heat blowing on my face and the solid tenor of Geoff's voice singing "you are loved" at the top of his lungs; green eyes wide with happiness and his chuckle interwoven at his missed notes. I would look at him and he would wait patiently for me to spill and once I had finished a five minute rant about why there were tears in my eyes, he would pull the car over in the temple parking lot so that the windshield was overlooking the Rexburg valley and take a deep breath.

"you are loved, sister." he would say. "don't give up. you are worth it; you deserve it, this is part of your plan, just trust in it. Trust the boy; listen to him because he knows you and he understands. don't give up, don't give in."

and I would take a deep breath and realize that he was right and that I do deserve love and that I am capable of being in this super healthy and stable relationship and that I should just listen to that boy, like Geoff said, because he is honest with me and we were meant for each other.

i just need a pep talk from Geoff.