2011 in review

On the last day of the year, I go through every blog entry I've written and relive every high and low moment I experienced over the last 12 months. As I was doing this today, I realized that 2011 was a huge year. a HUGE year. Here is a recap:

I said the hardest goodbye to my best friend and love of my life as he left to serve a mission in Mexico.

I past the five year mark of my diagnosis date.

I celebrated my 21st birthday and went to the festival of colors.

I drove across the country with my dad in 42 hours. straight. 

Dustin was reassigned to the New Hampshire, Manchester Mission and we had to stop writing.

I got my knee totally replaced and my life slowly, but surely, back.

I got accepted to teach English in China for spring of 2012.

My parents were called to be service missionaries at Zion's Camp and I spent every day serving there with them. 

I purchased a DSLR and learned how to view the world through a lens.

I healed faster then thought and decided to go back to school.

Hurricane Irene hit New England.

I became an official five-year cancer survivor!

I went back to Idaho.

Dustin and I got to write again. <3

I met Sebasthian and Elysha (Dustin's trainer and his lovely girlfriend) and got to photograph them!

I dyed my hair red.

I became a lead student at my job, became close with the girls I work with and spent thursdays with Paige eating thai food.

I finished the semester and came home to my Cazz Machine

I am making preparations to go live in China for five months.

Yes, this year has been challenging in more ways then I could ever have imagined. But I learned a lot and a grew a lot and I'd like to think I'm the same person as I was in January...just a better version. 

puzzle pieces

Everything is finally falling into place for the next five months. Financial aid has come in, all my debts have been paid, my car is running, I've started purchasing necessary and needed things for China and all three of my doctors have cleared me (again) to travel abroad. I'm really going. This is really happening.

I'm about to live a dream and nothing is going to stop me. 

Chelsie in China

PLEASE do me a HUGE favor and go to my new blog "Chelsie in China" and follow it. I'll still be posting on Into the Wild for the next month, but I decided that I needed a new blog for my adventures in China. Into the Wild is my refuge and much more personal and I don't want to give out this URL to everyone who wants to follow me in China. Don't get me wrong, I'll still write here, but for all China purposes, I need to have a separate blog.

So please, hop on over there, follow it and prepare for coming along with me on the adventure of a lifetime!

Eleven

Eleven months ago, I made one of the hardest goodbyes of my life.
But now, I have only 13 months left until I get to say one of the happiest hellos of my life.

They will see us waving from such great heights.

I love you, to the moon and back. 

Christmas Weirdness

It was weird, this morning, opening up gifts with just the three of us girls and my parents. Weird to not be arguing with Jake over who gets to sit in the recliner by the fire. Weird to not see him jumping for joy when he opened up his beef jerky that Santa brings him every year. It was weird leaving for church in one car...in my car, because we only needed five seats to get us all to the chapel. It was weird to fit my whole family in one pew, weird to come home and look at our gifts without Jake being there to try to trade candy with us. It was weird setting the table and knowing he wouldn't be there. 

But then the phone rang. And my mom gave me a skype name to type in. And there he was. 

and for 45 minutes, it wasn't weird at all.

I'm so proud of my brother and the great things he is doing right now. I'm proud of the person he is becoming. 

I'm grateful for Christmas and for my family; for singing alto with my mom at the top of our lungs during the Christmas program at church today and for laughing when we hit weird notes. I'm grateful for my parents and their effort to keep us centered on Christ, for reading the Christmas story this morning before doing anything else. And I'm grateful for Christ and his birth. My Bishop said today that without Christmas, we wouldn't have Easter. Without His birth, we wouldn't have had His death and Atonement. Because He was born, I know that I can be with my family forever.

I'm grateful for this weird, but truly beautiful Christmas Day.

Merry Christmas, from me to you.

on the way home

My hands know the roads and I know which stars to follow.

too close

You are too close, too close.

And the hallways that never knew you echo of your constant shadows,

scream of their emptiness,

because they understand your absence now.

and your footprints are on the dirt roads, 

the ones that used to belong just to me.

and they all smile at me as they tell me how

your hand has been placed in all of theirs.

and the life I've been waiting to share...

you have discovered it all on your own.

Because nothing ever goes right for me

668 dollars later and I'm driving home in my Cazz machine with a new wheel baring, new wheel axel, two new tires and freshly aligned and my breaks start to shudder. And then my check engine light comes on. And my mechanic leaves for vacation in the Bahamas tomorrow.

But, it could just be a vapor lock-I filled up the tank on the way home for the first time since April and I wouldn't be surprised if that messed up with things. So, tomorrow I'm going to disconnect my battery, rest the light and see what happens.

It's just funny how things like this always seem to happen to me and my automobile.

From us to you

Merry Christmas!

With love from,

The Whitneys

Being home means constant Christmas music, constant fires in the woodstove, constant baking and constant laughter. It means little kitty paws running up and down the hallway outside my bedroom late at night. It means long warm showers, extra blankets on my bed and ice-cream every night for desert. Being home means winding roads and frozen lakes. It means evenings at Juli's house with warm tea cupped in our hands, or evenings at Brett's house watching basketball, or it means evenings at my own house with my family and telestrations. It means long car rides with my dad to random places, last minute Christmas shopping with my sisters and running errands for my mom. It means afternoons spent with Gov and Sheila, cooking or watching tv or brushing PK. Being home means Saturdays at Zion's camp spent roofing a cabin, it means Friday evenings playing with my sisters and it means New Year's Eve with the Bratt's, the Grotenhuises and the Campbells. It means playing "vicious coyotes" with Kaleb and Jack, it means sitting in primary with Mom and her kids and it means curling up with my favorite books.

Being home means family, happiness, comfort and love. Being home means safety and acceptance. Being home means I'm close to everyone who is important to me. And, being home means my heart is whole and that my soul is on fire. 

New England, my heart will always belong to you.