I was up until four thirty in the morning; not for lack of trying to sleep, but because my roommates chose the hours between midnight and four thirty to be particularly loud. My alarm went off at six thirty and I was awoken from a somewhat nice, but weird dream to the dreading thoughts of my english paper and everything else that awaits for me today. And as I sit here, trying to finish up a paper that I just can't seem to stretch to 1500 words, my head pounds because two hours of sleep was not enough and this huge knot of anxiety is sitting in my stomach and I want to be sick and I can't concentrate on this ridiculous paper and I just realized that I have to reformat the stupid thing because it needs to be in APA and not MLA. It's not even six forty five in the morning and I already feel like I am on the edge of some massive explosion.
I just want to curl up with someone I feel safe with and be told that everything will be okay, but that isn't always the answer to life. Sometimes I have to face what's coming head on and then find security after the worse is over.
and while all of this is going on; while I feel totally and completely overwhelmed, I look out my window and realize that I have watched the sun rise slowly and steadily while trying to write this ridiculous paper. The faint glowing on the horizon is enough to make me realize that my life is beautiful, no matter what it holds or what is instore.
I can survive today.
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