this too shall pass

If I really think about it; this all started with Hamilton.
And I know that doesn't make much sense, because the Hamilton incident was almost a year ago; but the more I think about it, the more I realize that it started with my little green Hyundai that decided in upstate New York that it didn't have the strength to make it across the country.
Last minute flights to Idaho in order to start school on time meant a hasty repacking of my crap in order to make my suitcases weigh in under 50 pounds. It wasn't until Dad and I finally had our feet on Idaho soil and were unpacking and moving into my new apartment that I realized I had left my bag of hair accessories  on my bed in New Hampshire. My hair was in the awkward grow-out dye stage and so while dad and I hit the dollar store for some soap and toilet paper, I grabbed some hair elastics, pins and a bright teal bow to tie me over until my mom could ship out the rest of my stuff.

That bow that I bought in fall of 2009 is the reason why, over ten months later, I sit here with a bit of an aching heart, some sass back in my personality and a little bit of some spunk in my step. The car that didn't make it across the country, the hair bag that got left behind and the dollar store bargain bow. That was the start.

I wore my bow two days in a row. Different classes, no one would notice.
But you did.

and our awkward your mom jokes turned into late night facebook chats and that turned into hanging out outside of class, which turned into flying kites and snowcones and holding hands, turning into cuddling and tickle wars and that turned into a kiss, which turned into more and before we could embrace it, we slammed on the brakes and caught ourselves before we hit the ground.

You make me happy. You make me feel alive again. And I'm sorry for the confusion that took place this week. Thank you for staying, for holding me and for being okay. I love spending time with you.

We'll be okay.