it is official

well, i first need to call the office tomorrow and make sure I still have a job, but other then that...
I'm going back to Idaho in September.

I can't even describe how hard of a choice this was for me. I have loved every single second of being home this summer-my family is amazing and through the opportunity to serve at camp, I have grown close to some very extraordinary people who I will have a hard time leaving. I don't have a lot of worries here, and every day, I fall more and more in love with New England. I was looking forward to spending my first autumn here in over three years and having Thanksgiving with my family. I would be close to Boston, in case something went wrong with my knee. So much of me wants to stay home.

But after crunching the numbers, it looks like it will be smarter to go back to school, where I have a solid job, loan money and the opportunity to adequately prepare and save for China. By going back to school, I would be saving 150 dollars a month by not paying for Cazz (he'll stay home) and that will go to the China fund. I'll also be able to see a ton of faces that I haven't seen in AGES, hopefully live with Misao again, be around for the birth of Trish and Russell's first child, be able to hang out with my new friends Elysha, Tara and Paige, I'll be able to write to my best friend again and not stress out about running into him at every possible stake activity and I'll stay busy with work and school.

There were so many pro's and con's to each choice. For the past week and a half, I've woken up with my mind made up and then through out the day, changing it. The reality of the situation is that once school starts back up, being home will not be as fun because I won't have anyone to play with. My friends are all across the country. And today I found out that the one job that would have kept me home was no longer available and that was it. Choice made. And everything seems easier now.

I've gotta grow up and be someone. I can't stay at home forever. I can't be afraid of being far away from Boston. The whole point of this new knee was to give me more freedom and my life back. I can't be afraid to live it! I found a path, I'm taking a breath, and I'm gonna run!

See you in a few months, Idaho.